Relating, Creating, Transforming

Posts tagged ‘growth’

An Ally Identity

Mark 9:38-41; 49-50     The Message (MSG)

38 John spoke up, “Teacher, we saw a man using your name to expel demons and we stopped him because he wasn’t in our group.”

39-41 Jesus wasn’t pleased. “Don’t stop him. No one can use my name to do something good and powerful, and in the next breath cut me down. If he’s not an enemy, he’s an ally. Why, anyone by just giving you a cup of water in my name is on our side. Count on it that God will notice.

49-50 “Everyone’s going through a refining fire sooner or later, but you’ll be well-preserved, protected. Be preservatives yourselves. Preserve the peace.”

What is an ally?

Image result for lgbt ally

The organization GLAAD [not an acronym] defines an LGBTQIA+ ally as:

-a listener.
-open-minded.
-willing to talk.
-inclusive and inviting of LGBT friends to hang out with your friends and family.
-not assuming that friends and co-workers are straight.
-not afraid to speak out when Anti-LGBT comments and jokes are made.
-someone who confronts their own prejudices and bias
-a defender against discrimination.
-a believer that all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, should be treated with dignity and respect.

At the Parliament of World Religions in Toronto this November, I’ll be co-presenting a workshop entitled “How to Be an Interfaith Ally.” Here are some highlights of the definition of an interfaith ally:

Image result for interfaith allyAn interfaith ally:

-Is aware of one’s own thoughts and feelings about spiritual identity.
-Builds religious literacy
-Is aware of current social and political events.
-Treats everyone as individuals
-Does not obligate anyone, regardless of their outward appearance, to share or speak about that in any context.
-Avoids assumptions and gossip. Allows the individual to share his/her/their identity in their time.
-Uses inclusive and appropriate language and confronts harmful, oppressive language.
-Shows support for or encourages creation of the Interfaith community.

See, there are many specific ways to contextualize what an ally is. An LGBTQIA+ ally will look different than an interfaith ally in certain cases. There are specific actions that apply to specific situations. Overall, though, an ally in any context shares important characteristics and behaviors.

For the sake of this conversation, allow me to define an ally as someone who:

-stands with those who are not heard, marginalized, disenfranchised, or oppressed.
-listens well and does not judge.
-learns, learns, and learns some more!
-recognizes diversity and difference, not as a threat, but as an essential fabric of humanity.
-knows when to step back and when to step up.

Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about human development [evolution, change, becoming].

I’ve noticed that many adults in our society sadly believe a narrative about themselves—that they are incapable of change. That their perspectives are locked in place and that the way they see themselves and the world is static. I don’t buy this for one second. I fully believe in the capacity of all humans [no matter the age] to continue to develop and grow, to evolve, to become. We are built that way. But yes, as adults it does require us to make more of an effort in our development. We first have to embrace the possibility of growth change; then we have to seek it out, care for it, be willing to leave behind old paradigms, and be willing to listen and learn.

This relates directly to being an ally in any context, because in order to be an ally we have to confront our own prejudices and assumptions. It is necessary for us to consider other perspectives that we previously viewed as impossible or crazy, or perhaps we never even considered such perspectives.

So to be an ally we have to evolve.

I look at Jesus of Nazareth in the Gospel stories and it jumps out at me—Jesus was an ally. Jesus stood with and for those who were voiceless and oppressed, including but not limited to:

Widows, children, lepers, the sick, the materially poor, Samaritans [the ethnically oppressed], the homeless, the unclean [religiously marginalized people].

Jesus was an ally. And if you look close enough, Jesus was trying to teach and mentor others to be allies. Those who followed Jesus didn’t join a religion or a church. They followed a path. They lived a new kind of way. They shifted away from old paradigms to new ones. They sought to create heaven on earth by balancing what was out of whack in society. They were changing, developing, becoming. And they were called to be allies.

But the followers of Jesus struggled with this. They argued over who was the best ally, the greatest follower. They struggled to listen to each other. They carried deep and historical prejudices with them. It wasn’t easy for them to learn how to be allies. Case in point—in this particular Mark story Jesus’ followers aren’t happy that someone outside of their group is healing someone. How dare someone else do the good work THEY were supposed to be doing! But Jesus called them out on this. “If someone is for us, they are not against us.” Quite the paradigm shift, no? We often hear the opposite of that phrase. See, Jesus didn’t care if the insider group did the work of healing or if people outside the group did it. Part of being an ally is not letting your ego get the best of you. It’s celebrating the good things others are doing, even if you don’t get any credit or benefit from it.

And Jesus, in this Markan section, closes with a healing word of wisdom: Everyone will be salted with fire. Remain salty, and be at peace. Salt and fire were symbols and actual tools of healing in Jesus’ time. This remark is about the ally community—that yes, there will be times when we screw up. We will say or do something hurtful, even if we don’t mean it. But there’s always a chance to heal. Fire and salt. Wounds are healed. People are welcomed again. We learn and grow from our mistakes. And this leads us to be at peace with one another.

This ally thing is hard, no doubt. It’s messy, it’s risky, and it’s sometimes unpopular. But it’s SO WORTH IT.

Add to this discussion. How do you know when someone is your ally? Reply in the comment section.

Further, if you wish to have some resources about how you can be an ally, visit here.

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